A different kind of Saturday Night

So you are back in town. You called me, told me you are home. You are home early because her husband came back. How embarrasing fo you. How crappy my life has turned out. Yes, it is good that I found out while I am still young. As much as I am not in pain right now, it is only because I am not looking at you. I can't look at you. You were with someone else. And even though I don't know this for a fact, I can figure it out. I don't want to know anything you have been through in the past five days. Just because her husband came back early, if you really had a hotel room wouldn't you at least spend the next 3 days exploring the sites. come on! you spent almost 500 dollars to be there. Enjoy yourself right? Yeah just as I thought. You didn't have a hotel room. You were in the house with her, and her kids. Fuckin APPALLING!!!. Who are you Julio? Who the fuck are you? If this was someone else you would be totally disgusted. I have no need to see you. I can't. I have already gone through enough pain. I can't put through myself anymore. Thanks for the drama though in my life. Thanks for a nice painful story I can add to my list. Yours tops them all. Walk an inch in my shoes and you would see, then you would feel really crappy for being another painful memory. Is that all you want to be for me a memory? Old Julio is not coming back. Thank God for that. So you grew balls and are doing what makes you "happy". I have nothing to say to you. I wish we could be friends. I wish we could be in each others lives, it is way too too painful. too painful. I love you, but right now I cannot look at you. I wont recognize you. You are not the boy that said he wouldn't hurt me. I want to go home to you. Believe me nothing would make me happier right now, but to go home and just be with you. I love you. I really do. But I need to stop hurting myself. I can't endure anymore heart ache anymore. I have enough right now. I can't intentionally add anymore. Stop calling, you never called me while you were away. damn Julio, I trusted you. I will not be jaded by this though. I will love again, just as strong as I loved you. I wont become bitter and stop myself from finding the right one. I love you, you have shown and taught me so much. But you are the biggest loss of my life to date. Hope no more. Life is weird that way. I never thought this would be me. Crazy isn't it? Good night Julio, I love you baby. Please always know this. But I need to protect myself from anymore pain.
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